Two weeks ago I had minor surgery on my right foot to remove a gnarly wart that had set up camp on my heel. Warts are embarrassing, even typing the word “wart” makes me gag a bit. It’s gross. I am sorry, I really am.
I have had a similar surgery before about 10 years ago and thought my wart days were over, but my third pregnancy must have triggered it again. Children really do ruin everything. So I knew right away that over-the-counter remedies probably wouldn’t do much to help and treatment would have to wait until after delivery. In addition, after delivering Huck in February I had already met my insurance deductible for the year. So every doctor’s visit and medical procedure I go to from now through December is free. I’m going to get ALL THE DOCTORS and fix ALL THE PROBLEMS.
I’m going to make it rain prescriptions! Ha.
So anyway, I found a podiatrist that took my insurance and made an appointment. When googling his practice’s address his yelp review came up. I find yelp reviews for people in the medical field to be a bit weird. I would have a hard time reviewing my physician the same way I review a hamburger. But that’s just me. I noticed that the first line of the review was describing his physical attractiveness, actually I think the word “Hotttness” was used, with three t’s. (why not five for a five star review???)
I’ve been going weekly for the last six weeks to slowly work on it. The “hottt” doctor has alternated treatment strategies, all of which feel like tiny nuclear warheads are being unleashed in succession on my heel. Technically, I guess it is like bioterrorism on a microscopic scale. Take that, abnormal cells! ::karate chop:: Burn, bitches!!!
We are nearing the end of treatment as the wart is virtually non-existent at this point. I’m starting a count down until I can go for a real pedicure again. Last week “hottt” doctor offered advice on distance running because I mentioned that I wanted to work up to running a full marathon one day. (I ran a half-marathon two years ago) He was really helpful with tips on stride and posture and how to avoid shin splits.
And get this, he even called me skinny! Well… he called my ankles skinny.
Maybe that was just flattery, or the way he gets people to write good yelp reviews. But it made my day regardless.